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Before I begin this tirade against personal freedoms, please read the comment that one anonymous reader sent this past week. It's at the bottom of that post. I’ll wait . . .
Did you read it? Good!
That reader’s comment brought my frustrations with traveling to the surface. Long before terrorists were getting through, I was tormented by the hassles of going through airport security. I was ready to buy my own plane and avoid all commercial flights, except I couldn’t afford one. I honestly did have fantasies of whisking in and out of airports, having my own pilot (gorgeous, of course) and thumbing my nose at the authorities.
With long hair pulled up into a silver clip, I set off their alarms every single time I went through. And they wouldn’t believe me that it was just the clip! So I had to let my hair down, go through the process of trying to get it all back into its proper place, and get on with my trip. I wanted to stick ‘em with my hat pin!
That particular scenario doesn’t hold a candle to what they would have us do now! All along I’ve said that it wasn’t us little old ladies who were the suspects. Our current POTUS has finally said what needed to be said all along – keep them off the plane if they are on a list of naughty guys from a bad country!
Duh! Did it take us this long to figure that out??? I’m as interested in getting the bad guys as the next person, but sometimes I wonder if we haven’t gone too far, and not far enough to really stop the attacks?
Back to my reader’s comment. People have been traveling with dildos in their suitcases and carry-ons for eons, and will continue to do so. The trick, I suppose, is to find a substitute for your dildo (isn't it already a substitute for something else?). Find an object that will do the same job for you without titillating the examiners. But where’s the fun in that, I ask you? I read of one airline that was sued because they embarrassed a poor woman by dragging out her dildo and waving it in front of everyone.
So now this poor anonymous gal (guy?) wants to know about wearing butt plugs while traveling. If you’re a guy, maybe you could tell them it’s a prosthesis for a sagging penis. Or if you’re a gal, tell them it’s the latest thing in tampons and you’re having your period. Does the x-ray machine tell them exactly where this object is located? Hey, guys with knee replacements and pins in broken arms get through the gate, so why not something to help another important part of your body?
I honestly don’t know how to respond to this reader, other than to say, “Wait until you get to where you’re going to get your rocks off.” Either that, or pull it out in front of everyone, hand it to the guard and ask if he'd like to try it on for size. The deal would be to try to embarrass them, instead of letting them have the upper hand. Just don’t land in jail!
To be honest, after seeing some of the passengers, I’m glad it’s not my job to examine the folks going through. But I do I wonder if they’d let me choose which guard to do my strip search? Some of them are rather sexy!
I blow you a kiss ~ ~ ~
Fanny
