The Politics of Adultery

Is there anyone who hasn’t kept up with all the hoopla about our politicians and their affairs? And didn’t you giggle about it as you read?

Is there anyone reading this who hasn’t had their own spicy affair, as well?

Aw, come on! You can fess up to your Aunt Fanny!

It seems that no one has heard of the biblical story about the “sinful” woman who was being stoned. The Man looks up and says, “If any of you guys have never done anything like this, you get to throw the first stone at her.” All of them slunk away with their tail between their legs – or something like that.

But the self-righteous opponents of our politicians don’t slink away! Oh no! They start throwing stones, pretending that it proves they are unstained. I guess they skipped that story in the Bible because it hit too close to home.

I just read an excellent article on alternet.org about how adultery is not really a big deal. It seems practically everybody does it – or did it, nobody likes to admit it, and everyone enjoys it – men and women alike.

And what’s not to love about adultery? The “same old same old” gets to be the “same old,” doesn’t it? We all like to have someone pamper us and make over us, treat us like kings and queens. It’s fun to look at a different body in the bed next to us, make love a little differently than we’ve grown accustomed to. We like being surprised rather than being able to set our watch by how long the finger stays in that place, or rubs that spot!

Even if we have never acted out on those desires, the fantasies were there, weren’t they? Just the thought of something a little kinkier than last night’s routine can get our juices going, can’t it? Uh huh, I thought so!

This may sound like heresy, but listen up, kids! Our politicians have been having affairs since way before George Washington! It’s probably the only reason Methuselah lived as long as he did. It kept him going – even without Viagra or Cialis! It’s just that there wasn’t Twitter or Facebook or Fox News to whisper it in the world’s ear. We had to wait a few decades before that information made it into a few published biographies.

I suspect that the wives were enjoying themselves while the husbands were out cavorting, too. We women have been known to cast an appraising eye on men other than the one for whom we do laundry!

So I say, get a grip, folks! When your own zipper or your own panties never get pulled down, then you can point a wretched finger at our poor sex-obsessed politicians. Just remember the old adage that when you point a finger, there are four more pointing back at yourself.

Now where did I put my little black book?

I blow you a kiss ~ ~ ~

Fanny